The following came across my desk today via the internet. Now, I normally resist sharing the nonsense I receive via e-mail from those of my friends and acquaintances who've nothing better to do all day but fill my inbox with material that, at best, earns a breathy chuckle from me. This is one exception:
Beatrice, the church organist, was in her eighties and had never been married. She was admired for her sweetness and kindness to all. One afternoon the pastor came to call on her and she showed him into her quaint sitting room. She invited him to have a seat while she prepared tea.
As he sat facing her old Hammond organ, the young minister noticed a cut-glass bowl sitting on top of it. The bowl was filled with water, and in the water floated, of all things, a condom! When she returned with tea and scones, they began to chat.
The pastor tried to stifle his curiosity about the bowl of water and its strange floater, but soon it got the better of him and He could no longer resist. "Miss Beatrice", he said, "I wonder if you would tell me about this?" pointing to the bowl.
"Oh, yes," she replied, "Isn't it wonderful? I was walking through the Park a few months ago and I found this little package on the ground. The directions said to place it on the organ, keep it wet and that it would prevent the spread of disease. Do you know I haven't had the flu all winter?"
UPDATE 2/15/07: Apparently all the downvoters who thought this to be a cute little story and nothing more hadn't the slightest clue that it was my subtle way of saying "Whilst in the throes of romance on this most romantic day of days; don't forget to go about it with protection!" Either that or they were just pissed off they didn't have someone to snuggle for Valentine's Day.