I shut my eyes and imagined her for a minute. I remembered the way she used to lie there looking at me with so much love I found it hard to breathe.
"What are you looking at?" I'd ask only imagining how stupid I sounded.
"You" she smiled at me with her bright little eyes.
She had the most intense eyes I had ever looked into, it wasn't the color or anything like that. There was something so raw about them, I'd seen pain in them I could never feel and joy I could only wish to feel.
I knew there was much of her past she had never told me and there was much I had never told her. I had learned though over many years and relationships that sometimes this was not such a bad thing.
We would make love often, we had an attraction to each other that you only found once in a life time. The sex was tender and strong in a strange mix of our very different personalities. I would lay there still inside her, holding her so tightly all the while knowing that I could never hold onto her forever.
You had to know her to understand there was sadness to her, something so deep that it could not be explained in words. There were times when I would get a glimpse into the depth of her sadness, a glimpse into the pain I knew she held inside of her everyday. A glimpse into a world I could never understand.