I know what it is to be a chipmunk
I have been savaged by knife-wielding anesthesiologists.
I am... recovering from surgery... I am.... on painkillers... I am... without a girlfriend... I am...
Now that I've established my identity...
Yesterday, I got my wisdom teeth removed. It was...exciting. Curiously, the worst part was the needle. That's right, the IV. It's a genetic mental thing. See, my dad hates needles. As do I. Therefore, it is genetic.
Do not question me, mortal
So, there I was. 6:30 am - time to get up. 7:00 am - time to go to the dental surgeon. Whee.
Fill in the forms! Sign on dotted line.
Hello, I'm your doctor for the day.
Ooh, an EKG. Blinky lights! Biofeedback!
Hot Damn, here comes the needle! (what needle? I didn't feel it.) Even though my heartrate dropped by 40 after it went in - must be stress.
Bye bye, world! Nap time!
Ooh... I feel funny... Hmphgl? Out to the car! Goodbye, EKG.
Time for gauze. Sleep time...
That was yesterday
Today I slept, I read the Cryptonomicon, and I got to rinse my mouth with salt water. Fun. And take painkillers and antibiotics.
Right now, I look like a squirrel. My cheeks are swollen, because someone removed my wisdom teeth, and in the process managed to remove lots of skin, too.
Luckily, the painkiller is holding out. Otherwise I'd be pissed, or possibly whimpering, which is what I did when I vomited (probably due to the naseuating effects of the painkiller combined with the computer screen), and got acidic bile in my incisions. That was fun.