Barely touching the surfaces.
I think that a lot. I once wrote a
poem with that name. That's how I sometimes define my life. It feels like I'm never quite doing things right, never going the distance, always reaching out but
never grabbing hold. It sucks. I should be happy. But I'm not.
Every word that
escapes my mouth was not what I wanted to say. I'm never saying what I wanted to say. I can feel it in the back of my throat, even when I'm typing, and it never comes out.
Sometimes I just want to reach inside of me and grab onto that feeling or thought and put it into somebody's hand because it will never be understood any other way. Just like this.
There isn't much else to say. Just the
surfaces for today.