Students are bad, mmkay.

At cash machines, why do you have to stare at your bank balance for so long? You're broke, deal with it.

The pub/bar opens at 11am. Every day. No need to queue.

Last orders MEANS last orders. No, you can't sleep in the pub/bar. Get out.

When viewing student accomodation why do you believe anything the landlord/viewing agent says? They're agents of Satan. Do not believe them.

When you do eventually get your degree, the world DOES NOT owe you a living. Get off your arse, out of your parents house, and find yourself a job.

If you're lucky enough to be asked to an interview, put a suit on you monkey! DON'T turn up in jeans and a t-shirt.

If you've gotta chew gum, put it in a bin when you're done instead of spitting on the pavement or slapping it on the bus seat.

Why do you think you're always right? Your degree DOES NOT make you right. Shuttup and listen to the voice of experience.

I like fun. Students like fun. I like beer. Students like beer. I do not like loud obnoxious students having fun drinking beer. Students like being loud and obnoxious drinking beer and call it fun. Gits.

Do you think the world laughs along with your stupid college pranks? Do ya? Punk.

"Oh, you've got a Rise and Fall of Hats circa 1932." Brilliant.

On buses, why do you need to call your friend and spend the rest of the bus journey telling them about how poor you are and how your best friend cheated on you while you were throwing up on your £300 dress at a party. And then play all your ring tones - just incase your mobile phone manufacturor has secretly added one whilst you were on the phone. Do it at home.

You think you've got life hard? Try a job. A house. Kids. And a wife! 9 hours of lectures a week? That's gotta hurt!

Jealous now I've graduated? Me? Pfff :p ...never ;)
Inspired by my journey to work this morning.