"You can't be a lesbian, you wear skirts and stuff."
"Dude, that woman is so dykey...she's been totally ass-whooping the men here."
Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to introduce you to that brand new species of dyke.
The Lipstick Dyke
She may wear skirts. She may wear lipstick (no, really?). She will have high levels of dykeitude, and may also have high levels of lesbianality.
A lipstick dyke is that woman with the major balls, the woman who is gutsy and witty and has no problem with stating her opinion outright, served to you on a platter, with no frills or thrills attached.
Dykeitude, as ataraxia put it so well, is a matter of how much of a royal dyke (which, granted, can be synonymous with "bitch" sometimes) the woman in question is. But we all know about the high maintenance, high power lady executives who are known for sneering at slow men who get in their way, and who are ubiquitously remembered as being bitches. They, my friends, have high dykeitude. But note, they also wear lipstick and so on, are immaculately coiffed and wear heels bigger than most men's dicks.
So that's the lipstick dyke with the high levels of dykeitude.
On the other hand, we also have the actual high-lesbianality lipstick dyke. You know, that lesbian who has long hair, wears lipstick and eye liner, and who also may wear heels bigger than most men's dicks. Don't call her a femme unless she expressly allows you to do so.
She looks like a "normal woman" but in fact, she does sleep with women. She likes the ladies. And babe, there's nothing you can do about it.