discofever is actually the foreman for a cracker factory in Argentina where he oversees the insertion of salt pieces onto the tops of crackers, he secretly steals a couple each day at work and takes them home to feed his fifty foot boa constrictor in the bathroom.

ElectricMollusk was spawned from a can of sardines once owned by Napoleon, he has been struck by lightning four times.

yossarian was once duped into purchasing a house constructed of balsa wood.

It has been rumored that ailie is actually a time traveller from the future, she possesses the ability to transform oranges into cars and vice versa. Better be careful around her.

Dman was spotted smuggling small kittens across the border of an unnamed Eastern European country, he was caught, interrogated for 12 hours, tortured by the water torture method for 5, and released when all proved useless. He now resides in an underground cave equipt with high tech blenders.

zot-fot-piq was discovered in an arctic ice flow, thawed out, and found to be 4000 years old, having 7 fingers per hand, and a small patch of fur behind his right ear.

Knarph purchased a small box from a roaming vendor, inside this box was a leprechaun. He taught the leprechaun to perform gymnastic tricks in his living room for entertainment, he would frequently invite guests over to watch. One day while knarph was passed out from a rowdy night of drinking, the leprechaun escaped and took most of knarph's posessions with him. That is how we ended up with the plea to Help keep knarph from being evicted and/or starving.

SpinyNorm consists of a small desert cactus which has been fused with a multitude of electrodes by the US Army and wired to a computer in one of the craftiest attempts at AI to date. He is noticably more cranky after the incident where 1/4 of him was eaten by a ranging and helplessly hungry coyote.

Saige was once walking on the beach, when she was suddenly accosted by a bear riding a bicycle which had escaped from a travelling zoo five hundred miles away. The bear, being rather tired from this long journey on such a small bicicle proceeded to eat Saige's left arm, as well as one toe from her right foot. After doing this, the bear proceded to maul several other people further down beach and subsequently fell into much needed sleep. When authorities finaly arrived on the scene, Saige was whisked to a hospital and had a monkey arm (treated with nair) grafted on. However they forgot to graft on a new pinky toe, which is why Saige refuses to go without socks.

artfuldodger comprises of a secret misguided Nasa experiment to make men of herculean a strength by fusing men with rocks. Consequently, he is no stronger than the average man, but is required to carry around a 90 extra pounds in weight as his bones are made of granite. Once overcoming the horrible lethargy due to his new weight, he was still quite bitter and embarked upon a spree of pushing over old ladies and putting used chewing gum onto the underside of public tables.