Josh and I were acquaintances at best.

I would see him every now and then with Trevor. Never knew his name before the beginning of this semester so whenever I made reference to him I labeled him as "blond guy that hangs with Trevor". Because until a few days ago that was all he was to me.

When Ashleigh IM'ed two days ago and asked if I knew a Josh Myers I really had to give it some thought. The name sounded a bit familiar, and since I was curious as to what her motive was I went ahead and typed "yeah".

"Did you hear what happened to him?"

No, what happened?
I figured he had gotten arrested for drugs or something because that was the type of guy he was. While I waited for her answer I took out my yearbook and scanned the pages until I found the name. When I saw the picture I recognized him as a guy that ate lunch with me.

The "blonde guy that hangs with Trevor". So I actually did know him.

But what she said next shocked me.

She told me that he had died in a car wreck the day after Christmas. I really didn't know what to say. She told me the details about how he was late coming his girlfriend's house and had some how lost control and hit a tree. Later I found out from other people that something must have jumped out into the road and he swerved to avoid colliding with it. He went over a median, hit a tree and his car flipped. Upon landing it burst into flames. The police could not identify the body. No way to tell his race or gender because of the burns.

Josh is the first person I ever "knew" my age that died innocently. He wasn't DUI, he wasn't involved in gang and/or drug violence, and he didn't commit suicide like any of the other people I know. He was doing something I myself do everyday. Except he died. This is the first time I am actually scared. People always say that if you don't do this, then this won't happen. But what do you do when death comes when your just trying to live?

I thought about going to Josh's funeral today, but I'm a coward. I don't want to deal with reality. I don't want to admit that it could happen to me. I just want to live.

Girard Joshua Myers IV
1983-December 26, 2001