I haven't daylogged in a while. Maybe it is time for an update, maybe. *sighs* I went to go check out a school yesterday, it's near Dayton, Ohio and it took three hours to get there. I don’t know as I like it, but if I have no other choice I know I could get into there. Although, I really could wait another year to go to a Real ™ school, unfortunately I really really don’t want to wait. This is really hard for me; waiting that is… I will find out by next Tuesday if the only school I have applied to will let me in, they have a 45% acceptance rate, and that kind of scares me. Worrying no longer helps. This is one of those things you just cannot think about until the letter smacks you on the forehead "HELLO, I AM THE LETTER YOU HAVE BEEN WAITING FOR! YOU DON’T WANT TO OPEN ME, I AM BAD NEWS!" That is what I am afraid of I think, being a failure in the only thing I have ever really wanted, too dumb to get into the really good school, I might have to settle for the not so great. I am really hoping that in a week I will be posting another daylog ranting about how wonderful it feels to be accepted and how I knew it all along; but this daylog will reflect the fears of more than six months of waiting.

On a different note… I met a whole bunch of wonderful people when I went to the gathering in Atlanta February 28th, 2003-March 2nd, 2003. =) I love you all. I met the most incredible people there. I cannot wait till Hot Damn 3: nodestock. =) That is sure to be fun.

I also have to mention that I heard from him today, seems he is doing will in Perth, enjoying the weather. Said it was 104*f there the other day; too hot for me, that is for sure. The other Chris is busy with school… his projects are due Thursday though, so he will be relaxed and not in the computer lab all the time soon. The other Swede is just down right cool, I have to mention him somehow… he is very funny… but I shouldn’t give away that secret.

A friend of mine became an aunt today. Her brother has a baby girl named Ava Madison. She is lovely.

Enjoying Spring Break, and staying out of trouble for the most part. It's nice not having to get anything done. I hope the weather breaks soon. I want crocuses!

Going Under

            Now I will tell you what I've done for you
                        50 thousand tears I've cried
           Screaming Deceiving and Bleeding for you
                       And you still won't hear me
  Don't want your hand this time I'll save myself
                     Maybe I'll wake up for once 
                     Not tormented daily by you
    Just when I thought I'd reached the bottom
                              I'm dying again

                            I'm going under
                           Drowning in you
                      I'm falling forever
               I've got to break through 
                        I'm going under

	Evanscence from the Fallen Album.

Update: It snowed last night. No end in sight. "And it's May, Still it snows.."