What do Elton John, Britney Spears, Rod Stewart, and Alanis Morrissette have in common? Wealth? Adoring fans? Ok; but they've all also been rumoured at one time or another to have been involved in an identical and rather unusual medical emergency.
I first heard this rumour in connection with Marc Almond, formerly of Soft Cell. While on tour with The Marc Almond Band, he was taken ill just before a concert suffering from acute stomach pains. He is said to have been rushed to hospital, where his stomach was pumped in order to remove more than a pint of semen which he had swallowed while giving his band pre-concert blow jobs.
Clearly this is not a credible story: it practically has a flashing neon 'Urban Legend' sign on it. But remembering it the other day, curiosity got the better of me and I decided to search around on the internet for more information on it. And sure enough, I found a long list of musical stars who have been associated with this rumour over the years.Those star-studded swallowers are:
Elton John, Rod Stewart, David Lee Roth, Marc Almond, David Bowie, Jeff Beck, Jon Bon Jovi, Andy Bell of Erasure, the drummer for Bon Jovi, the lead singer for New Kids on the Block, the Bay City Rollers (all of them!), Alanis Morrissette, Li'l Kim, Foxy Brown, and Britney Spears.
If you're still harboring any suspicions regarding the truth of these rumours, Oxygen.com's helpful Dr. Gardos is there to set the record straight. In response to a question from 'a mom wanting to know' about the truth of this rumour in connection with Li'l Kim, he writes the following:
"Although you would have a hard time doing it, if you swallowed a pint of semen the worst side effect you would have is heartburn.... Of course, if you eat too much of anything you might vomit, but that is about it.... If you or your daughter don't believe me, try to figure out how many ejaculations (which average two teaspoons) it would take to make a pint!"
Doc, I'm working on it.
- alt.folklore.urban FAQ at http://www.faqs.org/faqs/folklore-faq/part4/
- Dr. Gardos at http://thriveonline.oxygen.com/sex/experts/drgardos/drgardos.09-24-99.html
- fondue, who suggested the addition of Andy Bell