You get home from the shops laden with plastic carry bags
which make you sweat
if they touch your bare skin
for even a second
You collapse through the front door, expecting a wall of cool air to hit you as you come in from the sweltering heat. Instead, the air is hotter than it is outside, as there isn't even a breeze hinting at a cool night. The spark of annoyance you've been feeling all day (you're never good in the heat, you just can't deal with it for some reason) turns into an unexpected tantrum. You drop the bags you're carrying mid-stride and walk to the air-conditioner. As you approach it, you hear a voice.
"It's broken. Don't bother," the love of your life says. You turn and see him standing naked against the fridge, leaning on the cool whiteness. You feel defeated- all day at work you've just wanted to come home to your nice cold house.
The love of your life takes a few steps towards you and winks.
"I know a way we can get even hotter tonight, baby," he says in what he thinks is a seductive manner. You just stand and look at him, incredulous. If you were any less horny you would be comatose.
"You've got to be kidding. I'm smelly and tired and hot and lazy and I've been at work all day and we have to go to dinner with your friends tonight. Get dressed," you snap.
Just another afternoon in summer.