There are two types of loss - what might have been, and what could never be. My reason and beliefs dictate that the later is always the case - it doesn't help much. Loss of any sort hurts - the only question is when is the discovery of loss. Even the discovery of a 'written off' loss hurts.

The greatest - and hardest loss is the loss of a dream. They aren't lost easily. They often take more with them than they offered. Is it possible to lessen the loss - to ease the pain?

Whatever the case, emotional pain is something that we all feel. It is not something that is inflicted upon us. It is our response to stimuli. It is rarely ever fair or reasonable to blame anyone (including oneself) for the pain of loss.

Still, all things considered, there may be (or have been) some way to reduce the pain of loss. It is never a wrong thing to wish or desire to reduce your own pain (I am a hedonist). I do wish it hurt less.