I’m horny as hell but desperate for love
Craving contact, bitches.
No more hook-up
s. They’re boring me stiff. No more starts to relationships
without a foundation
in something real. I want love. I want something real
. I want that incredible synergy
of friendship evolved into more
But damn I also want anything naked and male
How completely and utterly, disastrously dysfunctionally useless
And I think I’m going nocturnal
But the big thing is I can’t bring myself to tell him I want to see him again. Not that there’s any risk. If I don’t then I never will. I tell myself it’s for his sister’s and nieces’ benefit. But in the end, it’s generally a useless prospect; his emails are completely uninteresting, so I doubt it’s worth the effort. It’d probably just suck me into my useless cycle again anyway. Funny how you make contact with someone for three days and really really truly connect. Surprising as hell. I’m not hung up. I just wonder if the fourth day might have been interesting too. And how many more could have stayed interesting after that. Pissed off to not get to find out. I have got to find people who live in my town for once.
I give up.