You forgot some of the real clues that you may have a drinking problem.
  • You know the names of more people at your local watering hole than of the people you work with.
  • You see your bartender more often than the people you live with.
  • Your bar stocks top shelf tequila just for you.
  • Your bartender asks you how to mix drinks.
  • You dont need to see a menu to order a meal.
  • You can send the bar manager out on a search and rescue mission to purchase you booze.
  • You know where the bartender lives. because you have driven him home after closing time.
Some additional new items learned in recent field study:
  • You have had a bar tab over $1,000 in a single night. You drank alone.
  • You know you dont have a problem because you know someone worse than you.
  • You wake up next to that person in bed.
  • You consider a bottle to be a single serving. The bottle is 750ml of bourbon.
  • A single serving will not have much effect.
  • The only way you can justify having a job is it pays for the drinks.

While some of you will know I am describing myself, I do not suffer from alcoholism. I am a professional drinker.