Martha Stewart, most everybody’s favorite homemaker, is actually a demon from space
trapped here on the blue marble
who preternaturally extends her life by draining small boys of every drop of bodily fluid!
Because she is rich, she is allowed certain “eccentricities” which include a lot of uninterrupted
private time with a supply of young boys
kept steady by her staff and her fans.

Any doubts you may have should be shorn away and rent asunder by this fact...

Martha Stewart has released her 1st ever CD. She doesn’t sing, she doesn’t give tips on how to make your home a beautiful prison, no, she doesn’t even read stories with that dry as skulls in the crypt voice of hers...
It is a Halloween CD called "Spooky Sounds" and it is filled with blood curdling, nerve shattering, bone jarring, soul shredding shrieks of pure horror, desperate pleas for mercy and the sound of flesh being ripped from bone, shredded between gnashing teeth, the nauseating wet sounds of things that were never meant to leave a living body.

As well as the otherworldly,inhuman roars of triumph trumpeting from some unspeakable thing

In stores NOW!

Now where do you suppose she got those noises, and why would she release such a "spooky" disk as her 1st?...

It was enough to convince me of what I already suspected...
Look into that place in you that knows things before your conscious mind even suspects,

you know in your soul that it’s true.