Knowing your brain is about to grow outward, a flower in full bloom (idea)
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Thu Jul 27 2000 at 2:14:05
When the movie is about to start or you're on
the first page
of something, do you ever stop a second and think, This is going to be a big one. Do you ever just know when something is going to change you? By the time I finish this,
a slightly different brain
. And you have to sit still and think,
knowing you will not be the same
in a few hours. Of course
everything changes you
and you could apply this to every little thing, every trip around the block. But you'd never get anything done.
why I left the letter
in the envelope for so long today. I tried to drive normally and
forgot where I was going until I was there
and I had to turn too fast and the car in back of me got mad. The radio had been on the whole time and I hadn't heard it till now. But now it was making me think stupid things like How can I drive while my brain is burning?
Later. Now I have read the letter from Lowell. And now I am different. But not in the ways I had expected. I always forget it happens that way.
He has done it before, written to me using the only words that would work. I do not mean he is manipulative. I mean
he uses the right words
someone very very talented
the right notes
on a violin.
I mean these words come out of him like the right music.
I like it!
I mean these words come out of him like the right music
'Get married soon,' he says. 'I want an excuse. I want to know you'.
You will know your action. You are present there, not thinking of somewhere else you ought to be.
The "future" does not exist
The Brain Within its Groove
How to hypnotize someone
Where there was fire I brought the gasoline
never trust a minty brained man
his whole life, like a thundercloud, out in front of him
You forget about everything for a few months and everything changes
Listen, we ended up ruined. I find my answers where I can.
I will howl in a deep lagoon
soda condom bracelet
Daydreaming on a lazy Sunday afternoon
I can't have an original idea anymore
Flowers for Algernon
Things you should never do with chopsticks
It's stupid enough to work
Lifetimes are catching up with me
George Washington's Inaugural Addresses
that old Philip Glass knock knock joke
Path of least resistance
The day after the porn ban
It's stupid enough to work
masturbation never breaks your heart
This? A winter's night depleted sunset.
the virtue of the disconnect
The Vandal's Myth
lies the cheesemonger told me
parting is such sweet sorrow
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