hmm.. panic attacks suck.. i am really torn right now.. i am trying to fight it.. trying to fight giving in to my total
self-destruction.. i wanna be good..i wanna be great .. bleh.. i pulled a 60 hour day tues-thurs.. crazy open eye visuals.. i wanna
be the girl with the most cake.. if i had the most cake i could feed the starving.. anyway.. i'm trying to be strong.. i know what i
need.. i know what i have to do.. but saying it is a lot easier.. "i love you.. i cherish your friendship.. but you have to leave me.. if
you dont i will wind up hurting you.. and i'd rather die than hurt you" - thats what the clock is chiming.. does one really need
something to believe in.. hmm..