(poetry) by jessicaj Sun Nov 19 2017 at 21:50:32
  1. After one gets divorced, the inevitable
  2. questions about dating arise. I've given
  3. it some thought; considered strategies,
  4. and realized I could use this place and
  5. my friends to get some feedback.
  6. About me: I'm roughly five feet tall,
  7. my hair is dishwater blonde, and my
  8. eyes are usually called blue when in
  9. fact they are bitter and green. I have
  10. two children, they are my everything.

 

  1. Health and wellness are very important
  2. to me. I work at a small organic
  3. health food store and I spend most
  4. of my meager paychecks there. I
  5. follow an extremely strict diet that
  6. is difficult to describe as it isn't 
  7. vegan, paleo, flexitarian, or
  8. any other simple appellation. 
  9. Nobody who kisses me willl be able
  10. to eat wheat, potatoes, or bananas, ever.

 

  1. Honesty is important to me.
  2. What are your views on women?
  3. Maybe you think I should be in 
  4. the kitchen; barefoot and pregnant
  5. are not on my agenda. What I'd 
  6. really like is a man who loves
  7. to do the dishes. Bonus if he 
  8. does windows and likes to pick
  9. up after teenaged slobs who
  10. sleep until at least noon.

 

  1. I like to write about footwear
  2. and feet. I'll be judging you 
  3. and your wingtips from the moment
  4. they come into view. Oh, by the
  5. way, I've been told that I'm 
  6. difficult to get along with, that
  7. won't be a problem will it?
  8. I'm not easy and you won't 
  9. get laid. Sorry buddy, not even
  10. if you buy me World Series tickets.

 

  1. Opposites attract so I really need
  2. a man who is at least six feet two
  3. inches tall, he can get things 
  4. down from the shelves and dust up
  5. in the corners. My bedding is pink
  6. and puffy, I have a quilt that is 
  7. patterned with roses, but I'm not
  8. a flower person, he doesn't have
  9. to buy me anything other than 
  10. red wine and dairy free chocolate.

 

  1. Sex is fun to talk about and I
  2. love to be kissed well by a man
  3. who knows how. I could die if I 
  4. tangle tongues with Mr. Wrong,
  5. but I'm looking for the Dr. Henry
  6. Jekyll rather than his alter ego
  7. Mr. Hyde. I never watch TV and
  8. don't own one. I don't do movies
  9. either. I can watch hours of 
  10. baseball and frequently do.

 

  1. Most of the time I can't sleep,
  2. be prepared to be woken up
  3. by a woman who has nightmares,
  4. anxiety, and has spent time
  5. at a mental hospital. Did I mention
  6. my children are depressed and
  7. we don't have the best relationship?
  8. I love them more than life itself,
  9. but I don't want any more and I'm
  10. not about to babysit for anyone else.

 

  1. Well dressed men please me. 
  2. I prefer late model foreign vehicles 
  3. and like Henry Ford, my favorite 
  4. color is black. I don't have a lot of
  5. clothes, I dislike using the dryer so
  6. I hope it's okay that our clothes is
  7. laying around my place. I love to
  8. iron and don't mind stripping for 
  9. you as long as you are well hung
  10. and can find the G-spot.

 

  1. Since I'm super emotional
  2. I need a rational man who
  3. is good with money and 
  4. handy around the house. 
  5. I love art, long romantic
  6. walks to the ball diamond,
  7. making a mess in the kitchen,
  8. and imported toiletries. I could
  9. tell you my age, but I like
  10. games and what fun would that be?

 

  1. This is rather longer than
  2. I thought it would be, but 
  3. my goal was to paint as 
  4. precise a picture as possible
  5. given these limitations. 
  6. Interested applicants should
  7. include their credit scores
  8. and most recent tax return.
  9. Recent pictures? Why on 
  10. earth would you need those?

 

  1. Hopefully my friend is 
  2. right and the man of my
  3. dreams is right around 
  4. the corner. People have 
  5. no idea what us women
  6. go through, especially
  7. those of us with children.
  8. It sucks to be single, but I'm
  9. confident that this ad will
  10. net me great connections. 

 

I like it!