Watch, as the pieces crumble.

  • I owe the school $5000. I have the money, but getting the money has turned into a huge problem. The trust fund, established for such purposes, has hit a snag somewhere, and I have not yet seen the money. I check my balance every day, and yet it is not there. I also check my online tuition billing information, anxiously wondering if I'll see any holds placed upon my records. None exist. They will soon, unless God, or First Union Bank intervenes.
  • I need to change my major. Computer Science does not interest me any more. I will probably never write another program in my life, save for the much-fabled windowmaker dock applet that grabs Sports scores & displays them. Not many Linux geeks like sports, which is probably why I use Windows. IS seems to be my best bet. We've heard the sayings since we've been freshmen: IS is Computer Science without the math or programming. From my experience, C.S. is all programming and math, so nothing would be a nice change of pace. But in the end, I'll still get a diploma.

    The question remains, with nearly half of my college career behind me, will I be able to make the switch? I cannot tell my father that I'll be going to college for another year to finish my degree. I can no longer put this type of strain on him.
  • I need to get back to the gym. I feel lousy.
  • My Necromancer died. So what? He was hardcore (meaning, if he dies, he's gone). He was level 59. I gave all of my equipment to a friend, and cursed computer games for the rest of my life.
  • There's a big hole in my life. I feel like I should be doing homework, or being with someone I love, except I have no homework, and nobody to love. She told me that she broke up with her boyfriend. This saddened more than anything else. I guess, despite my feelings for her, I was truly happy for them. I have no feelings for my non-existent homework, as all homework that I should be doing is for classes that I'll probably end up dropping in a few days.
  • I think I'll go to sleep now. Tomorrow, like every day for the past few weeks, is going to be another uphill climb. I see the summit. I see my banner, held over my shoulder. I see the bruises on my body, wearing me down. I also see the houses on the ground, far far below. It's easier now to go down, to give up. I made it pretty damn far, why go further? Why not just turn back, live a comfortable life with what I have?

I don't give up. That's why.