The proper way to make and take a Flaming Dr. Pepper
As related to me by a friend with a penchant for detail and a great memory, who's bartending his way through an expensive college.

1

Find your local cheap liquor store. Purchase one 12-pack of the cheapest beer* they have. Also purchase one bottle of Bacardi 151 and one bottle of Amaretto (no skimping on the good liquor, you cheapskate, you saved enough money on the beer).

You will also need several large glasses, preferably pilsner-sized glasses. Nothing smaller. And as many shot glasses as you have pilsners. A lighter, too (matches might be a neat flair, but if you're indoors, they'll fill the room with nasty burnt-sulphur smell). And, most importantly, as many friends as you have shot glasses.

2

Crack a beer and fill a glass half-way, with as little head as possible. While it settles down, pour a shot of Amaretto, but leave a little space for a splash of Bacardi. You don't need much Bacardi at all — just enough to cover all the Amaretto. Spark the lighter, and touch it to the top of the shot glass. (If you don't see a big red flame immediately, don't stick your hand in; sometimes it lights with a small weak blue flame that is still quite hot.)

3

Once your drink is flaming, it's time to make it a Dr Pepper: drop the shot glass into the glass of beer, and immediately suck it down. The beer puts out the flaming Bacardi and mixes with Amaretto, which makes it taste just like Dr. Pepper. Delicious!


Warning: if you've had enough of these, you get drunk enough to forget to keep your eye on the shot glass, and it begins hitting you in the nose as you finish your drink. This can happen quickly, as mixing beer and liquor usually gets you drunk PDQ. Funny the first few times, not funny the next morning when you've got a black and blue line on your nose.

So, every drink has a "proper" way it's taken, right? Some way to separate the pimply teenagers from the sophisticated adults? When you drop the shot into your beer, try to make as small a splash as possible. I'm not sure if there's a magic angle to drop it in at (if there is, I never found it), but obviously, the higher up the shot is, the bigger splash it makes. Also, drink this quickly — this is not a drink to nurse and get acquainted with.

Why use cheap beer and not the good stuff? (Aside from being a waste of good beer, you mean?) Cheap beer makes the Dr. Pepper taste more "real"; that is, the crappier beer you use, the more like a Dr. Pepper it'll taste. Something related to the amount of sugar in cheaper beers...I'm not sure, I'm not a chemist, just a fan of amusing drinks. And fire.

And why use tall glasses of beer? (You ask too many questions, just do it.) If you don't have enough beer, it won't put out the Bacardi (that would be a nasty surprise), and it'd taste strongly of Amaretto instead of Dr. Pepper. And a tall glass will prevent you from splashing on the bar as much.

Finally, you don't need to use Bacardi 151, but you do need to use something with an equal or higher alcohol percentage. Everclear would work, but there's a good chance the nasty, nasty taste would overpower everything. Or it might just blow everything up.


* NOTE: Milwaukee's Best and Natural Light don't count as "beer," so don't get them even if they're the cheapest. Seriously. Just don't. EVAR!!!1!!112!@11one