Before I knew about multiple
s I leaned against the wall in the pasty sea-green bathroom
at Garfield Elementary and I thought about my seventh birthday
(impending) and the importance of a number like seven
. I thought about myself at fourteen
, at twenty-one
, at twenty-eight
; numerology was not lost on me, even then, and that was before I saw all those seven up movies
Every birthday now I think about what I would have expected from myself
when I was younger. I've failed most specatularly, especially in the area of height; I'm only 5'4"
- I haven't grown and inch since I was fourteen
, and when I got that old, I looked myself over in the mirror, thinking how my reflection
only vaguely matched all the images I spun for myself
at the age of seven.