Two tear'y eyed goodbyes in one morning, just a little bit too much for me I think but I'm holding on as of yet. I spent the weekend with the dreamiest human in the universe and now that he's left I can't help but feel.. empty? Lost, maybe.. gosh he's so amazing. I've never felt like that before.. pressed up against someone and feeling like there was nowhere else in the world that I should or might be, just right there smiling and cuddling, being.

I guess it will seem odd for a while (that is to say, until we're close again), the absence and the staring blankly at things in some semi-dreamy state wishing, longing for touch and lips, soft, sweet lips.

I'm so lame, though, really.. I'm so self conscious I don't know if he knew exactly how much though he managed to make me forget about it completely more than once. I just noticed that when I close my eyes I can see him smiling, so cute, so incredibly cute. (Ded sexie, even.)

So how long can I wear these clothes that have him all over them before they need washed? Hm..

I think my family likes him, too, so that's quite nice. Of course they didn't get to see or hear much from him all weekend I was being greedy.

My brother went back to college today, too.. that was the other tear'y eye goodbye. I'm thinking of going up to my room and sleeping a bit but I just don't know.. it won't be the same without him falling off one side and me squished up against him laughing at random for no apparent reason (I really had no reason most every time, I swear).

I think I didn't eat much this weekend, but I can't remember exactly, though it might account for the odd feeling of distance I have going on right now.

I'm developing a strong liking for all that is Pink Floyd, I think, but don't tell herb, he'll think he's swaying me from Vince Gill. (It's probably true, but can't let him have that satisfaction..shh.) heh I also like the stuff we were listening to last night but I can't remember what it was.. I'll write more about this later and in other places, I'm sure..