Everyone, everything has.. a breaking point. I guess it isn't set in stone, it might vary depending on any number of conditions, emotional or physical.. but there will always be that point where you just can't take something anymore. I can't take the head games, the mindfucks, anymore. Actually, that's not true, I can and probably will take them for quite some time yet.. but I don't want to, I just will. I don't know what else to do.

How do you break away from everything all at once without destroying any of the things, people, that hold you? I just want to go, away, from everyone and everything that I know here. Everyone in this house needs to have more of a life for themselves, I can't be so intwined, I can't be such a large portion of any of this. I could be, but I won't last much longer if I am.. indecision. Everyone is so wrought with indecision.

I love my life, never the less, the way that these sporadic moments of pure bliss just happen along every so often. I just wish they weren't so few amidst a bunch of crap.

I know what I need. A road trip, a move, a big change, a very big change. Change frightens me, but it is necessary, especially now. I don't know how it will happen, if it will work out, but there's got to be more than this constant mess of bullshit I seem to be stuck in.