Well, here it is, three days before my sister's wedding, the day before Strong_Bow79, my kids and I were supposed to board a plane for Germany to be at the aforementioned wedding, and, in the case of my daughter, in it, and still no sign of passports for the kids.

My soon-to-be-ex-husband is stopping at nothing to hurt me, not even if it involves hurting his own kids. He still has temporary custody of them, which cuts me to the heart every time I tell their school I'll be picking them up for an appointment or whatever and they have to check with him to see if it's ok. He has no interest in these children - if he did, he would have shown it in the 3 years he's been gone. I mean, I'm sure he loves them, how could he not, they're beautiful, sweet kids, but he's not interested in being a father.

He has already told me that after the divorce is final and he has filed for bankruptcy he is leaving for parts unknown. I asked him why and he said "What's left here for me?"

I've given up saying "at least it can't get any worse", because it always does. He took my kids. "It can't get any worse". He took my car. "It can't get any worse". He cut off my utilities. "It can't get any worse". He interfered with my getting passports for the kids. I'm not saying it...

As a matter of fact, I'm pretty sure I know what's coming next. My daughter told me a week or so ago that he was going back to Washington to pick up his motorcycle, and he had said they were going with him. At the time, I thought we were going to be in Germany for a month, so I paid no attention. This morning at 3 a.m. I woke up in a cold sweat and realized that somehow, he's talked the Army into giving him yet more leave, and he's going to take my kids with him and there's nothing I can do about it.

My kids are with me overnight tonight, and I just want to clutch them to me and never let them go.