Dear
Miss Manners:
I got a very strange phone call yesterday evening.
The call was from an old friend. He and I dated for a relatively short time, more than four years ago. It quickly became clear that we were far more suited as friends than as sweethearts, and we quickly settled into a good friendship. I've always enjoyed his conversations.
So he called up yesterday, I thought to chit chat. Early in the conversation he said he was getting married this fall. I, myself was married a year ago, to my favorite man in the entire world, so my response was "Congratulations! When is it?" He replied, and I jotted down the date, planning to put it on my calendar.
However, a little further along, he stated that we were not invited to the wedding. Furthermore, not only were we NOT invited to the wedding, but apparently she, the fiancee, has "issues" with "old girlfriends" and he is now not supposed to stay in touch with me at all.
Now, Dear Miss Manners, I confess myself somewhat mystified. If this is the case, why call? Or if calling to let me know, why on earth tell me about the wedding? I find myself slightly hurt, somewhat pissed off, but most of all mystified. My husband is also disappointed, as he was looking forward to meeting this (now former) friend.
So my questions - what, if anything should he have said or done instead? And what, if anything, should I? I was very courteous about it, at the time. I'm certainly not very tempted to send them a wedding present- should that be considered an "announcement"?. I probably will do nothing at all, except be miffed for a few days, and then forget about it. I assume I'm not allowed to call back and tell him he's a wimpy pinhead and that she's a...well, I'm far too well-bred to say what I think SHE is.
Sincerely,
Miffed (former) friend