I am moved to tears by depression
. A lack of sunlight, a need for space, a need for closeness, an internal gauge being off, and not measuring the world the way it really is. The twist of the contrast knob on the world as I see it, blending and muting the color of life. I could love that you could do this to me.
Second, and seldom:
I cannot make a contribution of worth without my eyes watering, my nose starting to run. Not dropping off clothes at the Salvation Army
or giving $20 to a charitable cause, but giving of myself that something else may come of it
. That others may grow, learn, achieve. I can do this for you, it might make you learn to love me
I will cry for something so big. Something so small. The magnitude of a heart wrenching song
- combined with the most heartless of actions, or the most anticipated and adored return to me
moment ever. A leaf. The moon. This makes you mine. I will love you forever even if I never see you again. You will never lose me and I will never let you fade.
Fourth, and most disturbing:
I cannot cry for pain
. I have forgotten how. I will hate you with a fierceness beyond words to remember how the wrong way.