I've been thinking alot over the last five days
. A hell of alot. I've thought about how I want to change my life
and how I want to change myself
. I've pondered over what I think about peoples attitudes and how people react to certain situations. We aren't half dopey
Why do we handle situations so badly?
We all seem to hurt
the people that we care so deeply about. I know I have done it and I have seen it also. We all make so many mistake
s, mistakes that cannot be fixed. I have made a fair few this year. I have upset people and I'm sorry for that.
There was a time when I knew you were trying to help me, to make me happy and I just couldn't take it. I didn't want to be with you. I hated that pressure
, didn't you understand that? I had never had someone like this about me. Never thought I would.
I was unprepared for you...
The thing is when we like or love
someone so badly nothing rlse seems to matter. Feelings are hurt and friendship
s are broken. I don't want that ever to happen to me. I can never see myself falling in love, sad ain't it? I'm not the falling in love
kind, or maybe I am. I'll have to I suppose. I'll just have to see.
It isn't like I don't want. I want to get married
and maybe have kids
, I want to do all of those family
things. I just can't see myself actually doing them. Love comes with too much baggage
, too many tears
I just don't want to be hurt
, I've seen love rule