Throw enough shit against the wall, and eventually something will stick. That is the theory behind lowbrow.com.
Lowbrow.com is one of those rare websites that transcends commerce, education, information, and community. It runs the gamut from the bizarre to the sublime to the outrageous, all within a few brief clicks. It is half train wreck, half catfight, and all white trash.
In short, a joy to behold.
Basically, the premise behind LowBrow is that you, the world-weary traveler, can add your "moment" to the ether. A moment is just an entry in the great LowBrow database, but as the ABOUT page of the website notes, not just any old episode will suffice.
Lowbrow.com is about sweat stains on your wife beater t-shirt,
shaving your head, but not your mutton-chops,
owning cars with "t-tops,"
eating at fast food restaurants,
and having full-time diarrhea.
The entries are often a little too close to this description, but occasionally there are some truly gut-wrenching moments. Take, for example, the story of the guy who, jealous of another more popular guy, laced the guy's food with tapeworms, turning him into a social pariah. Or the tale of the boy who accidentally cut off his finger - only to have his baby sister pick up the disembodied appendage and start chewing on it.
Still, underneath this thick skin of tough love and redneck pasts, lies the most ingenious thought of all: that in our lowest moments are our most revealing truths. Some telling examples follow:
Okay I went out got really drunk, met a 2 great guys and ended up going home with one for a night of mind blowing sex. I mean great sex and I did things farther "south" then I ever thought I would or could do. A couple of days later the other guy calls and asks to go out. I'm not totally stupid. I know chances are he knows I shagged his friend. Still I agreed to go out with him. Wow...I'm a slut who knew.
procrastination is like masturbation, it feels good while ur doing it but in the end your only fucking yourself
Was reading about heroin today. On top of the supposed euphoria it provides, it also diminishes appetite. Things are bad when you're considering heroin as a weight-loss method. I only want to lose 10 pounds. Jesus Christ.
i haven't had sex in over two years. two years... that's 730 plus days. now you know why i cut you off on the freeway.
Air hockey is frighteningly similar to real life: Whenever I really, really want it, I play like shit. But when I couldn't give a fuck, I score like crazy.
I inherited another piece of shitty legacy code today. I almost screamed, but instead I consoled myself with a lunch consisting of three small bags of greasy chips, and a couple of cups of coke. It sucks to work for the borg.
I spotted a folded $20 on the sidewalk. I picked it up, trying not to be obvious and jump for joy. It was a religious pamphlet, disguised as a $20 to "shame" you for being so greedy, then lure you into a church group. I cursed God and threw it in the garbage.
Those people that think that it sucks to wake up in a puddle of their own blood have obviously not woken up in a puddle of somebody elses.
For years, I was annoyed by some of my elderly aunts who used to approach me at weddings, poke me in the ribs and cackle, "You're next!" It annoyed me to no end. I solved the problem when I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
a recent conversation
so what happens if someone takes you pennyante advice and does off themselves what the fuck are you some kervourkian for the lamespirited
wow i never thought of it as a problem with someones spirit
maybe it is
in a world of cash as cash can i may have overlooked the one thing that separates us from the monkies who fling shit at each other from trees
wait a minute
were not really alll that far out of the trees yet
I could go on with many more joyful nuggets of wisdom, humor, and vitriol. But I'll suppose I'll just leave you to it. I'm sure you'll fit right in.
To the person who invented the detachable shower massager;
I don't know you but I think I love you!