This spring, it will be the first year of my entire life that I have enjoyed the sun.

Yesterday I took such pleasure in laying out in the longish grass, it was all soft and lovely, and I sprawled out and felt like a foetus with my eyes closed being all warm and wonderful, and then the plump grey cat from next door toddled over and rubbed her face on my body for a time and ate some of the grass (does this mean she is ill?)

Micky watched me through the window. I like my garden. I like gardens. When you step outside my front door you can smell colourless flowers so strongly that when I come home in the evening I almost can’t believe I am alive and I don’t want to leave this place.

I used to think the sun was so garish and alien and I couldn’t see why anybody went to sleep in the coolness of night when the stars were out and everything felt different and less.. significant, without earth’s shallow blue blanket.. I mean you can see out for millions of years.

I did something today I will never tell anybody.