Yesterday, as I was walking to class, my ears were greeted by the sound of untrained voices penetrating the walls of the small theater on campus. I stopped to listen. Some of the singers weren't that bad: pleasant tone, the ability to sing on key, a few even had the vague hints of a vibrato. Others were tight, with little volume or resonance to them. I even allowed myself to think that they're not so great. Why, then, is it so hard for me to sing in front of others?

I've always had this fear. Even when performing in silly high school shows it was always hindering my enjoyment to some degree. I don't have a good voice by any means but my best friend, a pianist/singer, has said that, with a little work, I might actually have some ability. Despite my great love for musical theater I can only loosen up enough to sing when I am either:

I know that if I ever want to experience the joy of acting onstage again I will have to get over this. My inability to do so is one of the reasons that I want to write musicals instead of perform.