Talked to my orthopedic surgeon yesterday, he again emphasized how bad my knees really were, and how they wouldn't last another 20 years. How if I were older, he'd do a total knee replacement surgery on both knees. Great. So I asked him some more questions about the lateral release surgery; a small incision on the outside, four inch cut on the inside, weeks to heal. It won't make the pain worse, could help, and could help the kneecap last longer.

Told me to build up the quadriceps and hamstrings, which I have been doing. And stay away from hills when walking. And get in the water. I'll have to figure out a different strategy for exercise now, my neighborhood is pretty hilly.

This is really a downer. I'm really very unhappy about this physical situation. It's so hard to believe, cause they don't seem that bad, it's just annoying. I think I am so used to accomodating how to walk and bend and stuff so I don't have pain, that I have just forgotten what it's like to be normal. And I am still really grateful that this is all I have, that it could be something far, far worse.

Otherwise, work has gotten more interesting, I'm getting motivated to get my certificates in Domino Server now, and take a class in SQL Server and W2k server. We'll see how far I can get in the next month. And my romantic interest - A. - what to do, what to do. Such a complicated situation. Any sane, normal, practical person would have just walked away from her by now. I'm going to see her tonight. Can't wait.