December 13, 2000

10:23 PM:  It's amazing how much one's state of mind
influences one's self.

Today I started out in the bad state that I had been in 
previously.  Did some boring errands, etc.  Went out to
lunch with the 'rents and hated it.

Later this day, I got online and saw her online.. Rather
than waiting to see if she would message me out of fear
that she was annoyed by me and I would upset her, I sent
her a message.

Me:  Herro
Her: Hello smello
Me:  Did you guys have school today?
Her: Nope
Me:  Cool

Small amount of conversation.  Enough to let her know I am
there.  I dropped the conversation, and said nothing else,
just in case my fear was true.  If she wanted to talk she
would message me.  More from me could just be annoying.
5 or 10 minutes later:

Her: lalalala

Alright.  Guess she does want to talk.  What I've noticed
is that rather than asking me a question, she'll just try
to prompt me into taking action.  We had a nice 
conversation online and I started feeling better.  As I 
signed off I asked her if it'd be ok if I call her later

Fast foward:  I call her.  She is watching a TV programme.
Conversation is almost non-existant.  Most of the time
spent is in silence, me wondering what to do.  I wondered
why she'd do this.. Well, what I ended up doing was telling
her I'd call her back later.  She mentioned she was just
about to let me go.  In retrospect I probably should have
just honestly told her I don't enjoy talking to someone
who is preoccupied.  No one likes someone who can be walked
all over..

Anyway, I called her back a few hours later, established
an outing for us this Saturday and exited cleanly.. 
Cool.  ( :

Yes.  I do know I overanalyze.  When you have little 
interests like me, it's about all you can do.