One of the stranger
dreams of my life last night. In my sleep,
Jane dropped by. She's someone I've known on and off since about
sixteen, but not a very important person in my life, which fits with the few real people in my life that show up in my dreams - it's usually not the main players but the
understudies. We talked for a while about various topics, although I can't remember what. She had to leave, but her presence somehow... stayed, lingered. I remember thinking I'd need to call in an
exorcist.
With hard music that slipped away from introspection playing in the background, I closed my eyes. I could still see my hands however, even with my eyes closed. They shimmered with a bright whitish light, distinct against the usual black. I couldn't see anything else, but my hands stood out in my sight. Glancing down with my eyes still closed, I could see the rest of my body. Looking harder at my chest, my perception started to slip through the skin. It shook me the first time, but then I stared. My mind's eye passed the first level of epidermis complete with nipple and started deeper. Whatever layer I focused on was opaque, but the surrounding layers on both side were translucent. I sunk deeper and deeper into my chest until I came to my heart. It wasn't anatomically correct, but I could tell it was my heart. I somehow shifted the view until my heart was straight in front of my face, floating unconnected to anything and rotating like a display hologram. I was getting a kick out of the whole thing, so I tried to manipulate it, not through touching it, but just by imagination. First, I made it stronger and thicker, but I lost focus and opened my eyes. Closing them again, I repeated the visual dive and this time tried to change its appearance instead. My heart grew, and grew, and then deflated back to its original size. It then turned metallic and sprouted sharp four-cornered rivets. You'd expect me to feel something with the changes, but I felt no different. I kept on thinking how like a deep meditation it was, but I knew I was dreaming. My heart changed back and the dream was over.