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12:25 BST

Ugh, I've been working all morning without a break. I know that you're supposed to be proud after hard work, but I just see the imperfections in what I've been doing.

I had a "frank exchange of views" with my Project Leader today. I blew up at him after he stood over me for 10 minutes demanding to know when I would finish the racks. They're supposed to take a week to do - I've had a day off sick and about half a day at the doctors this week. I'm not surprised that the job isn't finished yet.

I cannot comprehend the mind of this guy. Every issue I had with my work or every problem I raised was greeted by a phrase straight out of management school. I'm reminded of that dilbert picture where people are stamped with the management template and walk off as pointy haired zombies.

Yearning to... fail

I replied to a girl who contacted me through an internet dating site. I sent a vapid, bland and boring email to her; possibly I was subconsciously trying to scare her off? She replied, telling me small bits about herself and also berated me a little about my "I'll try and make myself interesting" subcontext.

In my heart, I've already failed. My PMA is non-existent where girls are concerned.

I just can't find the root of my negative feelings about relationships. Am I afraid of intimacy? I don't think so. Do I hate girls? No! Girls are nice. Am I simply being lazy? Possibly.

The ADSL itch

My phone bill is now 60 pounds a month. BT have said that ADSL will cost 40 pounds per month. Why the hell haven't they rolled it out yet? (apart from the obvious making money hand over fist reason)

I have to admit that a large portion of that time/money is spent on E2 and irc. There's a small but growing part of me that wonders if some of that money should be going to the E2 creators...


what is so bad about cooling daylogs?