The Kim Li Diaries: Chapter Fifteen (fiction)
See all of The Kim Li Diaries: Chapter Fifteen
, no other writeups in this node.
Fri Dec 01 2000 at 4:35:43
Deck left the Kinko's with oil stain on his right hand where he had pimp-slapped the kid on his way out the door. He'd also gifted the youngster with a USB plug-in where it hurt him the worst.
The more Deck thought about all of this, the cloudier the picture became in his mind. One thing was as clear as that puntured kid's face would be in about 15 years, however:
Kim Li was not the innocent little kid with a shy grin on his face. No, Kim Li was a
ed some damn big names in order to impress Ute Lemper. He had done all of this to get the attention of some
that no one on earth even knew existed? What was
with that? Hell, at least Hinckley had his eye on
when he almost shot his own balls off trying to hit the
The CD told the story of how
had bought the farm. Kim Li whacked him while wearing nothing but a leopard skin g-string, a blonde
wig and a dangling condom.
? Kim Li had skied past him and sprayed a whole bottle of
perfume right in his beady little eyes, as Kim sang the chorus of "I Got You, Babe." Sonny hit the tree within seconds, and Kim Li seemed happy to report that you could still smell the stench of that
's product on that ski trail even today. Several dead rabbits could show you the way to the tree, if you cared to find it.
? Kim had sought
here and used a high-powered
him with a huge
rock from a mountain high
y boy was in mid-air in his little homemade plane.
John Kennedy, Jr.
? There were four people in that plane before it nose dived. Kim went out the back,
-style, with a signed photo from the other three. It read, "Great having you with us tonit. . .ARGGGHHH!"
And more than that, it was a family tradition. Deck hadn't bothered to read all the way back, but in the earlier stuff it was Kim Li's dad who'd done the
. Deck half expected to find the answer to half the
's unsolved files on that one shiny gold CD. But did he dare look?
The CD was some kind of underworld advertisement for an exclusive, and expensive, hit service. The diaries were Kim Li's more personal adventures -- he'd been born to a life of broads, booze and celebrity blowjobs from the look of things. Satan's blue balls! Deck wished he'd gotten some of that action.
The only reason Deck could think that Kim Li had pawned this thing onto him was that the
were about to be on him like
stiff upper lip
. Some big job must have gone wrong, very wrong, and Kim Li was shedding heat like the radiator of his Chevy Nova on a summer day.
Yes, Deck thought, as he put out two of the three Luckies he was smoking at once, this little bastard had played him for a
. Nobody does that to Deck Coffield; not at least without ponying up some serious
. . . / . . .
dannye and moJoe
I like it!
The Kim Li Diaries: Chapter Sixteen
The Kim Li Diaries: Chapter Fourteen
The Kim Li Diaries
The Kim Li Diaries: Chapter Eighteen
John Hinckley, Jr.
The Divine Invasion
What would aliens think of us if Everything was all they had?
Fires of Yavimaya
Green Chile Stew
A chronology of English color terms
We won't ditch Earth
Please tell me everything, this means you, I am hungry and also
True Native American Tribe Names
Japanese numbers and counting
The Book of Job
My meeting with Laetitia Casta
Trying to explain Everything to your non-Everythingite friends
Fires of Yavimaya
The Amanda Show
Zero player game
train fare to India
Midnight the Healer
Everything2 ™ is brought to you by Everything2 Media, LLC. All content copyright © original author unless stated otherwise.