Really bad coffee README.txt
Q. Ok, so I got this class in 20 minutes and I'm sooo tired - I just don't think I can make it through the day, what can I do?
A. Well you could try Amphetamines...
Q. Uh, yeah I suppose I could but I'm not really into that stuff. Isn't there a more legal alternative?
A. Yes, yes there is...
Q. Well, um, what is it?
Q. Good, we're getting somewhere. How do I prepare this "caffeine" of which you speak?
A. Well as you may or may not know, caffeine is a major ingredient in a beverage known as coffee. you'll need to obtain some of this before we go any further.
Q. But I got class in 15 minutes! Can't you just tell me so I can do it on the way?
A. yes I can.
Q. Well, I'm waiting...
A. Ok smartass try this:
- Tip 4-5 teaspoons of the coffee into a cup or mug.
- Follow this with an equal amount of sugar.
- Now drown it in about a third of a cup of boiling water.
Q. Sounds dangerous...
A. It can be, now Shhh! let me finish.
Q. Ok, please go on.
- Stir the murky, toxic smelling liquid for a few seconds.
- Add a very small amount of milk or cream (or ice cream I suppose).
- Stir a bit more and sit until the beverage has reached a drinkable temperature.
Q. Ew! Sounds lethal
, do you actually drink that?
A. Um...well I have tried - just this morning actually....
A. Ok you win! You'd be lucky if you survived...try a V
Q. Gee, thanks for your help LOSER
! Jeez, how do you survive?
A. One day at a time my friend, one day at a time....