I've been staying up until 4-5 am every night now for the past week. I can't seem to sleep as well as I used to. My dreams are haunted by my past memories and scary monsters. I like e2, I really do, only I feel as though people brush me off as a 12 year old in an 18 year old body. I can't help but have fun (in my opinion). I've been spending a lot of time in the IRC channel of everything, maybe I shouldn't, all that seems to happen is someone yells at me, or calls me some name, or makes some comment about me. And maybe I should just not care, but I can't. It's like tiny pitchforks in my head, poking away at my thoughts. At least I think some people care about me now. There's always my parents but then again they left me alone for Thanksgiving AND New Year's Eve. Maybe I'm just not as wanted as I would like to be. Someone once told me that I play around too much, and maybe that's the case, maybe I need to be all serious as if I was wearing a suit and tie to e2 everyday. Maybe I need to make a new account and not tell anyone my name....