Last



Enter an island, the island you pictured when you were a child. This is the island you dreamed about; when you were a little boy or girl, only three or four or five years old, and your parents explained what an island was. It has the port, where small boats travel back and forth, from island to island, carrying a few passengers; where large ferries pull up, two at a time, every few hours, bringing numbers of tourists and cars onto the island. There is the main street, with its cobblestone street, and its hundreds of cafés and restaurants lining one side of the street, and the sea along the other side. There are beaches, where all the tourists lie, with the sun glimmering on their bodies through a grand blue sky, and the clear, crystal water at their feet.

When you first arrive in Skiathos, you will no doubt be propositioned by a number of hotel owners, trying to convince you to come to their hotel. If you have no place to stay, any one of these will be perfect for you, all the hotels are the same, they are all medium sized homes which have been turned into hotels over time. You will most likely have one room, with white walls, a window with a view of a cobblestone pathway or the sea, a double bed, and possibly a shower and toilet. The hotel is minimal, but you will not likely spend any time in it, and for only twenty-five euros a day, it will be more than worth the cost.

Once you get unpacked you will likely spend most of your time on the beach, or in the town. The town is fake, no greek lives like that in the rest of Greece. Three months of a year, people will come to work the tourist industry, but do they really live in that society? No. The town is fake, its not a living, breathing, thriving, self-sustaining town; it's a tourists' attraction in the shape of a city. The beach is amazing, but if you pay too much attention to it, or the town, you might miss the point of Greece.


"We all travel thousands of miles
just to check in to some place with
all the comforts of home, and you
gotta ask yourself, what is the point of
that?"
- Alex Garland


If you want to get tanned, go ahead, but why come all the way to Greece for something you can most likely find a few houndred miles away? If you came here, you want to experience Greece, and to do that, you need to live like the Greeks, beside the Greeks, with the Greeks. If you want to see the real culture, come out at night.

Along that same road you walked up before, that picturesque cobblestone road, that road. Its the one you got off your ferry onto, with all the other tourists who will only ever see the fake and surreal Greece, instead of the down and dirty place it really is. Its that same road that you had a frappe along. If you had walked the other way along that road, you would see another aspect of Greek culture. A short walk down that street will land you along a series of night clubs. This is where the real culture is.

If you want to have a truly Greek night, and if you're over fourteen years old, then walk along that road, and experience the ride of a lifetime. Walk to one of the cafés, and order a water pipe, with any flavor tobacco you want.

Smoke up, you're living the Greek life.
Drink up, you're living the Greek life.
Have another glass of wine, you're living the Greek life.
Have another shot, your living the Greek life.


Now that your high enough to dance, get over to one of thoes night clubs. Find the one that is really getting crazy, jam packed with people speaking in a language you don't understand. This is where you will find a culture like you have never seen before.

Order an Ursus, you're living the Greek life.
Here are the real Greeks, not products of the tourist industry.
Throw it back, you're living the Greek life.
Here are the fourteen year old kids smoking and drinking and dancing openly.
Have another, you're living the Greek life.
Here are the twenty-five year old greeks, bringing tourists from cafés here, to get them drunk enough to fuck.
Dance with some sexy blonde, you're living the Greek life.
Here are all the sad pathetic lives that are the real culture of any country.
Grind on her pulsating flesh, you're living the Greek life.
Here are the people you came to see.
Feel her hot body, you're living the Greek life.
I hope they live up to your expectations.
Take her back to your room, you're living the Greek life.
Now your one of them.
Feel yourself die inside, you're living the Greek life.



This is the island you pictured as a child.
Only you were wrong about how it looks inside.



Next