Last night I, your friend Behr (Friend Behr), received a telephone call. It was the Secretary General of the Straight White Men's Cultural Centers of America notifying me that I had been nominated to become the next President of said organization, which I have been a member of for many years. Initially, I went there to use their lending library, but then I was handed a number of brochures that seemed very legit to me and I decided to become a member.
Apparently they are impressed with the work I have done in breaking the wills of the lazy slobs I put to work in my North Dakota based coal mine (soon expanding to include a 19th century type textile mill). I am happy to accept the nomination.
I don't know if any of you reading this are members of the Straight White Men's Cultural Centers of America or not. If you are, I would appreciate your support and your vote.