Hi, friends of Behr. Dr. Sam Beckett here again. I am on a Greyhound bus heading out west, nah, just joshin' with you, we're heading to Baltimore. That is where I am led to believe Chopper will be found. You might know from being friends of Behr's for many years that he has a very close friend named Chopper. They fell out when Behr apparently died (???) and went to Hades? Not sure if I have that information right. It seems questionable from a scientific standpoint and I am a man of science with many degrees and I am FULLY TENURED!
Sorry, I keep having these outbursts. Whenever I have leaped into someone who is psychologically "unbalanced" with a strong personality I sometimes have trouble asserting my down home folksy Indiana personality over the personality of someone who is, say, a serial killer or serial masturbator (apparently your friend Behr is both).
It is my hope that when we get to Baltimore and find Chopper, I will be able to leap out and into someone with a healthier psychological profile. Charles Manson comes to mind, and you might think that is an inappropriate joke, and it is, you are right about that, but it is truth. You can't argue with the truth.
There was this one time that I did a leap and was working in a glory hole on Easter Sunday. That was a tough gig, but it didn't upset my stomach as much as this does, even after working three straight double shifts that weekend.
They are asking us to put away our electronic devices and put up our tray tables. The bus is preparing to make its descent into the airport.
Let me know if you have Chopper's address or phone number handy, any of you readers and friends of Behr. It would make this easier for me and Al, who likes when I talk about the glory hole leap.
Let me also quickly add something, while I have a moment on the bus, since it apparently isn't landing after all due to already being on land, as they say in the comic books. I decided to change into clothes from Behr's wardrobe after I leaped into him (since I was naked except for boxers and black dress socks with holes in the toes and my hands were both in the boxers when I leaped in). He apparently wears 1970s style suits with polyester Hawaiian shirts along with red Keds all the time so I put that on. I am bringing this up because in the pocket of the suit jacket I found a folded up piece of paper marked "important."
Opening it up, I found written the following information, which I am guessing was written by Behr:
I like to watch people eat cake. I like to grab a chair if they are eating cake in restaurant and pull up to their table. Stare at them really really close. Love it. Do more often.
Goodnight and God bless.