"Sorry I left you with nothing more than words
dropping silently into a bucket
making my ears ring"

This is one of the few utterances that I have hurriedly scribbled down in my journal these past months since I left Nashvegas. Today, I fought with my mother, missed my best friend, felt an ache for an old friend or two, and felt more loved and alone than I have ever felt.
A few days ago, I was told that I suffer from depression, to which I almost replied "That explains a lot!! No wonder I never get out of bed anymore!"
These past months have made me think and experience a lot. Now I am left to myself. I spend too many days just driving around Memphis, sluffing off my duties and attempting to find beauty in the passing trees and white lines on the road. I, whom you know as chevette, have become a dreamer, a slacker, an artist, a musician and more confused than I have ever been.

I have realized that all of us are lonely, aching for one thing or another. Personally, I am aching for love and companionship, but not only those, I desire to know purpose. So, once again, I am pulling out my compass and pointing it toward my northern star...

"time gets in the way
of everything I've ever wanted to be
time gets in the way
of that sparkle in your eyes
time gets in the way again
of all I wanted to show you
when you look at me
you don't see me at all..."