End it someday
What's that sound?
In the someday
What's that song?
From Nirvana's 'I Hate Myself And Want To Die'
I am twenty-four years old, living with my parents and unemployed. But, I digress. I
occasionally, when I feel human enough, or motivated enough, will leave the house to
acquire necessities, like cigarettes, or food. Well, anyway, this one fine day I thought
to myself, hey, wouldn't it be great if I went out and bought some stuff, especially since
I had just come into possesion of a princely sum of about $39, from an odd job taken days
earlier. Everything went well enough. Until the return trip. With a plastic bag stuffed
with ice cream and cigarettes, and mouth full of Milky Way, I happened upon an Old Acquaintance, who also happens to be a neighbour.
- What are you doing here?
- Just came back from the store... How about you?
- Me? I'm going off to work, you know, the usual. A bit late. Have to catch a cab.
- Aren't you working at that place? As a draughtsman? You're not working
- (At this point, I could lie or just avoid the question but I figure since everybody
already knows anyway, I somehow or other manage to say,) Not today. Or tomorrow. Or the
day after that. Or ever. I don't work there anymore.
- (Surprise) Oh god! What happened?
- (I shrug and mutter something inaudible under my breath)
- Oh my. Well, I guess it's hard to find good work these days. I got a good opening at
this place, if you want.
We sit and bull for a second or two, just enough for a cigarette. The sun blinds me and
makes my armpits sweat and I cannot stop grinning. My thoughts invariably turn inward and to
the past. How I wasn't always stupid and and unemployed and uneducated. How supposedly smart people can get bad grades. How you believe your
childhood will never end. How-
- Oh, well, have to keep going. See you around.
- Yeah. See you.
The End (or so I believe).