I am waiting in
traffic,
I have nowhere to go but I am in a hurry to get there. The cars are not moving. There is a good
song on the
radio, but I am not listening. The sun is shining bright and the sky is filled with
soft white clouds, but I do not see them. A man is walking a
dog on the sidewalk, it is sniffing and darting, excited by
everything that is around, but
I do not care.
I am sitting at home, looking out the window and wondering why I am not happy. There is a tree, tall and strong, gently waving in the breeze, but it does not interest me. There are people throwing a frisbee in the parking lot, laughing and having a good time, and I feel alone. I strum a few songs on my guitar, but it sounds dead to me now. I want silence, but wait for the phone to ring.
I am at work, not getting anything done. I am sick of being bored but I can't bring myself to do anything. I am sick of people calling but I want to talk to someone. I am sick of computers but I cannot get away from them.
I am biking along the river. The water is dirty and I notice this. The joggers and bikers I share my path with seem alien to me. The sun is bright and warm, but all I can think is how hot it makes me. The grass and trees are alive and green, but I do not notice. The turtle I saved is in the water somewhere, but I barely remember him.
Sometimes, I forget to see the beauty that is all around me. Sometimes, I forget that the past and the future are not important. Sometimes, I forget to live.