Something my father
said to me numerous times when I was a kid
I was approximately 10 years old, struggling with my math homework
. I was having a hard time to understand
something, and he apparently got frustrated
trying to help me out.
Knowing that he has quite a temper
(and has passed it on to me as well), I'm aware that shouldn't take things he says while upset
that seriously. And since math was the only subject he
was good at as a child
, hoping the same from his children is understandable. Furthermore, a common conception is that one must be either athletic
to succeed in life. And I'm definitely not athletic.
What if he really meant it?
What if he was right?
- or more specifically my lack of motivation
to study the subject - did
my chances at graduating
. I still made it, but only to find out that getting in to almost every Finnish university
or a similar school
I'd be interested in requires the applicant
to be a genius mathematician
. Even when the subject
doesn't involve much or any number-crunching at all.
And with no education
, I'll be stuck in dead end jobs
like the one I'm currently in, with no hope for a raise
, let alone a promotion
Was he right?
Should I just kill myself
now, instead of wasting society's resources
for the duration of my life as a B-class human being
I simply refuse
that there is neither hope
for people like myself. Maybe I should make my goal of life to disprove
the old man's theory
, why bother? I for one don't measure the quality
of my existence
alone. For 21.5 years, I have been a happy individual
without the big bucks.
Just let me go on being ignorant
I'm sure I can survive