This is my first attempt at a day log so, please, be kind.

I've had some (not much) time to reflect on the events of yesterday and in that short time I'd like to first off express my sympathies and condolances to the families, friends and loved ones, no matter who you are, to the victims of yesterday's attacks.

I, however, was (and still am) feeling a little jaded towards some of my fellow "human" beings at this point. Here's the reason why.

I live in what might be called a medium sized midwestern city and work for a rather large (Fortune 500) company. When news first started breaking about the events of yesterday I mentioned to my boss that I had grown up in NYC (Brooklyn to be exact) and worked in the financial district appx 2 or 3 blocks from the World Trade Center for about 7 years. I probably know many people that I grew up with and susequently grew apart from worked in that area. It got me to thinking about them, my life, how lucky I am to be where I am, and God know's a million other things. My boss said he could he could understand my feeling's and offered me the afternoon off. I picked up my daughter early from school and went home.

I guess its kinda different. Hearing radio reports and descriptions didn't prepare me for the extent of the carnage that was vividly displayed on TV. It's one thing to hear that the towers went down but another to actually see what occurred, especially to a place that you are so familiar with. I guess I wasn't prepared but then again, who was?

Flash forward to about 4:00 pm EST

The phone rings, its my boss "reminding" me that an assignment I was given earlier that day was due by 10:00 today. I had a hard time with that, basically for the circumstances described above, and tried to explain my position. No good, a job is a job and the best way to get over this is to go back to work -he explains.

I can not fuckin' believe it.

Have we all grown so callous and unfeeling as not to be affected by the events of yesterday....

I'm sorry this is so disjointed - I'm trying to write it during lunch and emotions are getting the better of me. Good thoughts to all my friends, past, present and future.