I got off work this morning at 5:00am; a consequence of going into work at 7:00pm the night before. In the normal run of things I don't work Monday nights, but I called in sick Friday night because of a case of the "I feel terrible everywhere" malaise.

I returned home and went immediately to bed. 9:30am rolls around and I find I can't sleep anymore, despite the 2mg of Lunesta and the 4mg of Xanax I took before bed. I hate it when this happens.

So now I'm up. I took 30mg of Adderall, because I need to stay up for my psych appointment this afternoon at 4:10pm. There'll be precious little time to sleep (perchance to dream) in between the time I return home from the appointment and the time I'm due at work, so I'll pop another Adderall before work. Then three hours later I'll head into work.

I hate days like this.

I'll play my typical (if somewhat manipulative) role and suggest new dosages for Seroquel, preferably 800mg (400mg on waking, 400mg before bed). I'll also tell Dr. Townsend that Wellbutrin is doing more harm than good (in the form of night sweats that smell very strongly of rancid Méxican food), and I'll also request a few sample packets of Ambien CR, just to see if it can vie for the better sedative against Lunesta, which works only sparingly so far.

My back and just about ever other muscle mass in my body is screaming in pain, so I'll ask him for a referral for a neurologist or other specialist who handles fibromyalgia patients.

I emailed my bosses (all four of them) with the possibility that I might have a debilitating disease or syndrome or whatever. Hopefully this will buy me some time before getting the boot, or at least a little sympathy and understanding from said bosses.

In the meantime, I'll be killing time, smoking, until the World of Warcraft weekly all-servers-down maintenance period has ended (1:00pm), then play to kill more time before I leave for my appointment.

All other things considered, I feel like ass.

For those of you scoring at home, or if you're by yourself, my current meds roster:

  • Lexapro®, 20mg/day.
  • Adderall®, 30mg/day.
  • Seroquel®, 200mg/day.
  • Lunesta®, 2mg/day.
  • Xanax®, 3mg/day.
  • Ibuprofen, 1600mg/day (as needed).
  • Celexa®, 40mg/day (for when I run out of Lexapro, thanks to my incompetent, unrepetant insurance provider).
  • Neurontin® 900mg/day (morning, midday, evening, 300mg in that order).

The above are all prescription-only meds.

  • VegLife® Vegan Multiple One (multivitamin).
  • Vitamin Shoppe® Gamma Aminobutyric acid (GABA), 750mg/day, which helps regulate the occasional panic attack.
  • Natrol® 5-HTP, 50mg/day (my serotonin levels are apparently having a grand old time playing football or something.
  • Sundown® potassium gluconate, 595mg/day (I have a potassium deficiency, which contributes to my minor hypertensive condition).
  • Biochem® melatonin, 6mg/day (at bedtime, ostensibly to assist the other sedatives I'm taking).
  • Biochem® Thyro-Max, 200mg/day (the medical sector has yet to determine if I have a thyroid problem).
  • Gaia Herbs® echinacea supreme, 270mg/day (to keep my chronic rhinitis at bay).
  • Nature's Bounty® chelated calcium/magnesium (can never be too careful with deficiences of same).
  • HerbPhyters® adrenal blend, 500mg/day (an additional anti-rhinitis supplement).
  • Pepto-Bismol®, 262mg/day as needed (my stomach is in a constant state of churning and I think I've developed irritable bowel syndrome).
  • Eclectic Institute® kava kava (whole lateral root), 750mg as needed (for when I get too worked up on Adderall; this stuff and Xanax, let me tell you, are two great tastes that go great together).
  • Various Halls® Fruit Breezers for when I enter into an uncontrollable coughing fit (probably due to smoking).

And today I expect the following to be added to my daily meds roster:

  • Seroquel®, 800mg/day.
  • Ambien CR®, 12.5mg/day (as an experiment/in competition with Lunesta).
  • Ideally, something, hell, anything he can prescibe me to make me feel better, in general, even in small amounts.