Here's a little treat that is real easy to make and is oh so good. They're great to serve at parties (and they're called "party pizzas," imagine that) and you and your guests will love them! And those of you who already know about these and make them, you probably know what I'm talkin' about here!

You will need to run down to the store right now and purchase the following items:
Yes, I said now, dammit!

OK, here are the directions. Pay real close attention because they're really, really complicated:

I'm not going to worry about exact measurements because a) It's all up to how you and what fits your taste best and b) this is a good snack to whip up when drunk and who the hell messes with measuring cups when you're wasted?! Anyway, cook the beef or sausage until it's safe for human consumption. Then combine in a pot some of the Velveeta cheese, Worcestershire sauce, ketchup, and the beef/sausage. Cook that stuff up until it's good and melty, then spoon onto the rye bread slices. Voila! It's party pizza time! Make sure they cool a little bit before you eat them.

Some people like to just do the cheese, meat, and rye bread slices, but don't listen to them because they suck.