Definitions of love abound, ranging from a passionate all encompassing feeling to friendship or merely fondness for an inanimate object. A random search on Google will turn up 120 million hits for the word love. The Greeks used 3 words to describe the different types of love; philos, agape and eros. Romantic love or eros can not really be adequately described, only experienced. To my husband and all lovers today I dedicate this Valentine

It will soon be 20 years since we pledged our troth on that beautiful spring morning. I think I was more enthralled with the idea of marriage itself than what it really meant. Little girl fantasies of dream houses inhabited by Barbie and Ken assured me that I would find my perfect mate. Never mind that my own family was far from ideal. I was innocent and carefree. I was young.

True love

What did that mean really? As I searched for fireworks, I found friendship and sex, companionship and passion, but not love.

As a teenager I loved intensely and fervently but not with true understanding. The years passed and I thought I had finally found the one, but alas I was not his true love.

Then finally it happened. You wooed and won my heart. How could I not fall for someone so witty and funny and persistent! Guys, no matter what they say women like to be courted. If you want the girl find out what is important to her and make it a part of your repertoire.

Once the banns were posted and the words said I found out what real love was:
  • Adjusting to sleeping with a blanket snatcher.
  • Waking up every morning listening to the symphony of your snores and liking it
  • Warming to the idea of (__________) because it was important to you
  • Learning when to charge into battle or to surrender the fight (I'm still working on this one)
  • Acknowledging that when you quietly clean up after me or do the laundry or any of a number of other things it means "I Love You"
  • Realizing you are my best friend as well as my lover
  • Knowing that you will always be there 'cause you meant it when you said "Til death do us part."

The years have brought aches and pains, wrinkles, more than a few gray hairs and an increase in girth but those are only superficial. Together we have raised a wonderful daughter and grown together in a deeper love than I would have imagined. We don't share the same politics, taste in music or need to communicate but somehow we have made it work.

…let there be spaces in your togetherness,
And let the winds of heaven dance between you.
Love one another but not make a bond of love:
Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls.

- Kahil Gibran, The Prophet


Happy Valentine's Day My Love