What Slap Bracelets
were to the '80s, Kerbangers were to the '70s. The rise and fall of Kerbangers reads much like the Slap Bracelet: a devilishly simple fad gadget
sells millions and then are suddenly pulled off the market when children start getting hurt in statistically relevant numbers.
Kerbangers were basically two funky looking translucent
, highly colorful spheres. Popular colors were purple and a deep cherry red. Usually the translucent plastic had silver flecks in it. Each plastic sphere was tethered at the end of a piece of string. When you held the string in the middle and shook the little apparatus up 'n' down, the spheres kerbanged into each other, producing a satisfactory clicking sound. Kids could and would keep this up for hours, driving parents and family dogs insane with the sound of those little bastards kerbanging away.
There was one small problem with Kerbangers. As the plastic aged, it got brittle
. Soon after their millionth plus one kerbang, there was a good probability a nice sharp chunk of the bright plastic would fly off. With millions of these in use on any given day, it wasn't long before there was a rash of "Golden BB
" incidents with hunks of sharp plastic flying into the eyes of children. That did it. Kerbangers quickly disappear from store shelves and the toy boxes of responsible parents
Although the toy died in the '70s, the word "kerbangers" lives on today as slang for female breasts. "Look at the kerbangers on her!"