My name is aneurin and those of you that have read my daylog entry of April 22, 2005 will know that I have been diagnosed with my own version of the big C and was off to face some fairly radical surgery in the form of a cystectomy and neobladder formation. I would like to thank all of you that took the time and trouble to send me your good wishes and words of encouragement.

Unfortunately me and Sister Morphine did not get on all that well. Apparently diamorphine makes me queasy. I don't remember much except puking my guts out a few times, which wasn't terribly pleasant, and having a strange dream where Everything2 was a real place; all glass and chrome set in rolling green mountains somewhere. (Someplace just west of Rhayader I think.)

On Saturday 7th May I was kicked out of hospital. They'd taken out all of their tubes and shit. I was mobile. I'd had the necessary 'bowel movement' as the medics like to say. So they kicked me home with a bag full of drugs and a wave good bye. Which is okay by me. Hospitals are depressing places full of sick people. They're the last place you want to be when you're ill, which is why they discharge you these days as soon as they can.

I understand that the surgery went as expected. So I've crossed that particular hurdle and my survival chances go up a few notches. I'm still left hobbling around the place like an old man, still in some pain and discomfort as my surgical wounds haven't completely healed yet, but still happy not to be in the place that smells so much of death and pain; happier to be home where the only sounds I hear are the birds singing and the occasional drone of a flymo in the distance.

One of the weirdest things I've found is that that I can't drink coffee anymore, it just tastes like shit. I thought it was just NHS coffee, but no it's the same for the real thing. It's real strange, I used to like mainline the shit and all I can manage now is a little latte, which is like girl's stuff for someone like me who had his own baby Gaggia to churn out that real Class A hit. Still smoking though, but nothing like before. Although I'm gonna have to give that up soon as well. I mean, it's quite likely the reason I'm in this particular hole so it's time to stop digging. Caffeine, nicotine, seems like every one of life's little pleasures are gradually being taken away from me. But what the hell, the alternative might have been no life at all and sometimes you just have to go with what you've got.

Time to get my mind focussed and start producing content again. Time to get back to building the database of my dreams.